Any advice on getting a toddler to go to bed awake?

Hi. I have a 2 year old boy that just wont go to bed awake and fall asleep alone. Its my own fault as i've nursed him to sleep as a baby. Now i take him up to bed and have to lay with him until he falls alseep. I know he'll get out of it the older he gets but sooner the better. Any ideas has anyone been through this?Any advice on getting a toddler to go to bed awake?
From what I have read and heard about doing this with toddlers, it is still important for things to be consistent. Your toddler will probably cry and that's okay, but you need to refrain from picking them up. Calm them down and soothe them, lie them back down and leave the room. Staying in the room, if leaving it just makes things worse, also helps as long as each night you slowly make your way closer to the door. They will probably still call for you, but you need to resist the temptation to pick them up and cuddle them until they fall asleep. You'll just be back at square one. It also helps for them to have something special to comfort them in bed. My daughter can't go to sleep if she doesn't have her fleece blanket.





Eventually you'll be able to lie them in bed, tuck them in and relax because you know they'll be asleep soon.








heres a link below worth a read and good luck with your little one!Any advice on getting a toddler to go to bed awake?
yes i have been through this myself only a year ago, you must put him to bed and close the door leaving him to scream i am affraid, you need to make sure he has a favourite teddy or comforter before closing the door.


best of luck xx
my little boy was the same and also it was my fault, i had to do the old fashioned up and downstairs hundreds of times ignore the crying and keep putting them in bed it may take a couple of days but it works.


they only cry cause its not what they want not because there is anything wrong!!!!!!
Be consistant. Also- prepare him for bed! Follow a nightly routine and stick to it! I have a 2 year old son as well and I've luckily had few problems, but believe it is because he knows what to expect every night. If you find that your son is falling asleep in your arms, try putting him to bed earlier. Everyone else is right- he will cry. But it will eventually stop. Our nightly routine consists of: bath at 7pm, playing 7:30-8 (Mommy turns into Pirate Mommy), flash cards and reading from 8-8:30 (this is a good time to do something slow and calm.... it will help you gauge how tired your child is!) then bedtime. I explain at 7 that it is bathtime, then we'll play, read then go to bed. Then we play and I remind him that we will then read and go to bed. Then I will tell him that after the story it's time for bed. This consistant behavior and preparation will keep you focus and let him know what is going on. Then you tuck him in, give him a kiss and hug and tell him you love him, and leave him in his room. Remember that nightlights create shadows that can be distracting or scary for young kids. Ignore the requests for one more story ot a drink- they are distractions! If he's anything like my child- he'll have a million excuses for why he should have apple juice or another story before bed. Just make sure that you are consistant. If he cries or gets up- give him 5-10 minutes before you go in to put him back in bed. Increase the time each time you put him in bed. There are so many factors to consider- temperature and noise- that could distract. Try to eliminate these. JUST MAKE YOUR CHILD FEEL LOVED AND SAFE! :) Good luck!
I think a bit of tough love is going to be in order. Dont beat yourself up too much, it's an easy trap to fall into to.


I'd start by preparing him before he goes to be, say tonight you are going to sleep like a big boy etc...


I'd stay with him for a couple of minutes then tell him you're leaving and say goodnight.


Wait outside his room till he gets up or gets upset. Go in, give him a cuddle, calm him down and leave again, keep doing this until he is asleep. Dont give up, it might take hours the first night but the second night will take less and the third night will take even less. Keep the cuddling to a minimum and keep voices hushed.


This time next week he will be going to sleep on his own, good luck x


Edit


Do not even try what cs2007 suggests. Leaving a child to scream alone in a room is a barbaric and unnecessary practice. You dont want your child to think that you have abandoned them. The technique i suggest may take longer but your child will be much more secure for it.
Try putting him to bed and then reading his story. You can start snuggled up next to him, and over the weeks get further away.
I know it seems cruel but I think the only way to do it is controlled crying. As long as you know your son is clean, fed and generally has no reason to cry then put him to bed and go downstairs. Let him cry for like 10/15 mins (this will be hell but be strong) then go up and sooth him, once he is calm go downstairs again and repeat as many times as it takes. He will soon realise that he's not getting anywhere and just go to sleep. It'll take a couple of days to a week but once you've done it you'll never look back.


Good Luck
yeh, just put him too bed and leave him. if he gets up put him back or let him cry.( very hard too do i know ). he will get used too the routine then give up. trust me it works.
Well as uv said its because you nursed him to sleep when he was a baby an now thats what hes got used to even tho hes bigger its just for comfort now. From the beginning i put my kids to bed awake an iv never had any problems. Ronan my 3 year old wants a dvd on in his room but he ALWAYS falls asleep bout 10 minutes into it!! My daughter kayla who is almost 2 wants a hot bottle of milk to take to bed with her along with her teddy an 2 dummys!! So these are the only bad habits kids have!! Maybe if you just try for a few nights to put your son to bed an turn off light an leave room an see what happens. Maybe he wont mind! x
I had the same problem. Start by putting a chair by his bed. Lay him down put on a night light and sit by his bed. Do not lay with him. After he gets adjusted to laying down and going to sleep without you, you can work on letting him fall asleep alone in his room.
I have an answer that probably won't be popular, but I know it works as one of my sons wouldn't stay in bad and go to sleep. We put a safety gate across the bedroom door so he couldn't get out and left him to cry until he realised that it wasn't going to do him any good. He didn't cry for long before he gave up and after three nights we didn't need to leave the gate there. This was back in about 1977, you'd probably be reported for doing it now.
I don't have any children so this may not be the best advice (I've seen many of my family members do this)





1. give him a cookie and some milk beofore bed.


2. walk him to his room. talk to him about how much of a big boy he is..(if he sleeps in a toddler bed have him help pull the covers back and get all the x-tra stuff off the bed)


3. Pick out a stuffed animal and tell him that Mr. Bear is having a hard time sleeping and if he could help you by keeping him company until he falls asleep...


4. Tell him you have to go and wash dishes or something but you will come in and check on him and Mr. Bear.


and in a few minutes go into the room and check on him...


if he is still awake. Tell him to talk to Mr Bear about his day.


he will fall asleep sooner or later.





But don't lie on the bed with him...





or you could just lie him in his bed turn off the lights and tell him time for bed and semi-close the door. Let him cry..-.just peek in and let him know you are there but its time for bed .(its okay builds strong lungs)





Both methonds have been done by members of my family and the kids are all okay..





Me personally when I watched the kids and time for bed I did the first one..(It make them feel like a big boy since they are takeing care of someone(thing) else)
i am a mom of two...the best thing to do is to let him cry. i know it sounds so mean...but it does work. i would just kiss them goodnight, tell them i love them, and shut the door...it took about 2-3 days and wow they sleep all night long!!!! if you are ever concerned just peep on him, but DONT TALK TO HIM!!!! lol the rule of thumb is never talk to a baby in the middle of the night so they grow to understand that its not awake time, its night time...lol its really funny how things work but it is sooo true!!! good luck to you hun! happy thanks giving!
I nursed my son to sleep until 15 months...he's now 17 months. I always used the boppy to nurse him and when he'd see the pillow, he'd point at it and start whining. I had to hide the pillow. The first week without nursing was rough. He cried a lot...and I let him. I knew it wouldn't last long and it would be better for him in the long run.





Now at 8:00 every night, i give him his pacifier and say ';do you want to go night-nights?'; and if he's tired, he says ';yep';. If not, I let him play until i see he's really tired. (Never later than 8:15/8:30.) When he's ready for bed, i pull him up on my lap on the couch and hold him for probably 10 minutes, and we just sit there cuddling and ';talking'; about bedtime, and our family and whatever stories I can think to tell him in a calm serene voice to get him to settle down. I don't ever take him from playing straight to teh crib. Last night we looked at a picture book of our family. I rub his hair and scratch his back and play with his feet to relax him. (NO TV!) Then we say ';goodnight daddy'; and Matthew waves byebye, we go in his room and he gets comfy in his crib. I put the blanket on him, say goodnight and walk out. Its amazing. Last night he brought the picture book in his crib with him and i left his nightlight on. He was laying on his back looking at the book when I closed his door. There was no fussing. 10 minutes later, I went in his room to check on him and he was sleeping, still clutching the book.





I have 2 points of why I'm giving you all these details%26gt;





1. This would never happen if I didn't let him cry. Its the hardest thing, but it really works, and my son is still as happy as ever. I thought I'd ruin his personality by letting him cry, but I didn't:)


2. Routine is key. He knows when he gets his pacifier that its time to sit on my lap and relax. When we say goodnight to daddy, he puts his head on my shoulder as I carry him to bed.





Another key is that he's not super hyper when I try to get him to settle down. I wait until the clues are there that he's getting tired. I also don't put him in TOO tired, because than he'll just get frustrated and cranky.





Good luck...its really hard, but in a month from now, you'll be so happy you did it.
My son was the same way. Only way to stop it is to play with him before the bedtime , maybe read him a short story ..call the whole thing a new game..and then tell him that is time to go to bed...once he is bed make sure that he knows that is safe to be alone and leave the door open ...he may cry a bit but he you leave him alone...after couple of days he will get use to it..Trust me..Sometimes only way to teach them is beeing little bit tough..and i know it will be painful for you to hear him be upset but trust me he will give up...and just so you know if you dont try it he will not grow out of it on their own any time soon. Just give it a try and if he leaves the room bring him back and then just go to bed he will learn ( KIDS ARE VERY SMART AND THEY WILL PUSH US TO OUR LIMITS) HAHAHA
I went through this when I was a kid. If you put him close to your door and read a book to him or sing him a song he will feel comforted. Make sure he has a favorite blanket, teddy etc. Gradually get him closer and closer to his room and he will feel safer like that. Im sorry to tell you but if my mom ever left me crying I woulden't want to sleep there but comfort your son he will feel safer. Let him play in his room alot and have him spend time in his room so he feels comfortable in his room. That is the key! Best of Luck!
Well let me start off by saying we have a 6 yr old boy, 5 yr old girl, and a 3 yr old boy. I completely understand your question. First step is to make a bedtime routine. Whether it be dinner, bath, then go in his room lay him down, pray for him, read him a book and tell him it's bed time now. Walk out of the room and shut the door. If he gets up tell him it's bedtime and put him back in bed. Make sure you have nothing else to do but getting him to sleep on his own because if you put him back in bed over and over and then give up then it'll be 10 times as hard because he'll be expecting you to eventually give up everytime and he'll fight longer. Just don't say anything. Put him in bed and walk out. Keep doing it until he goes to sleep. It may take one night it may take a week but it is well worth it. Thankfully we always put our kids to bed awake other than them occassionally falling asleep while they were nursing as babies. We did experience this same thing though with our daughter so I know how you feel. Hang in there. Trust me it is well worth it! Let us know how it works out.